Changes.

Things need to change, and it's not going to be pleasant at first.
Have you ever kinda woke up to see that your life isn't what you would like it to be? You've just been living your life and doing things without really paying attention HOW you're living and doing things...with rising anxiety. Well mine is pretty much coming to it's peak, so I've decided to make some re-evaluations.

The problems are, that it feels like I never have the time or energy to do things I feel would need to be done, like cleaning, exercising, and taking care of the dogs properly. There are multiple reasons why things are like this and I'm going to try to tackle every one of them.

This is my holy list of changes:

- First and foremost I need to cut back on using the internet. The main reason why I never feel like I don't have time for anything is this little rectangle black machine! I have a new rule, I'm allowed to check my Facebook account twice a week...and boy is that going to be hard! I'm way too addicted to it, checking it every five minutes or even more often when I'm at home, or even when I'm visiting someone. I calculated that when I limit my internet time to twice a week instead of everyday I save up to 21hours a week!!! 21hours! That's almost a whole day...that will leave me with plenty of time to do all the other things I'm planning to do.

- The second thing has to do with sleeping. If I want to be more energetic I need to sleep enough, go to bed earlier and wake up earlier. So bed time on a normal night (means I'm just hanging at home not doing anything special: going out with someone or something) is 11pm. I usually go to work at 12pm so if I wake up at 8am that would mean I have 3,5 hours of active time in the mornings before I need to go to work...and I still have slept for 9 hours. Not a bad deal at all.
The problem with this is that I'm not a morning person...really, I'm not. So if this proves to be too difficult I'll make some compromises with this one, or else I'll be really annoyed...all the time. But I'll try to make it work!

- No energy drinks. NONE. They are bad for me, and they cost a lot of money and are addicting. I drink approximately 1 energy drink a day. One costs around 2,5euros. That costs me 75,00 euros a month. Ridicilous, absolutely ridicilous. This is an easy thing to do, I'll just think about the 75 euros every time I feel like buying one.

- Remember my post around Christmas, where I promised to lose 5 kilos? Well I did promise that...but no I haven't lost the weight. I had a good start, but then life came and changed everything and whoooops I've actually almost gain 5 kilos. I haven't felt this dissapointed in myself for a long time, or been bothered about my looks this much either since my eating disorder times. My eating habits have spinned out of control, which have made my body crave for fatty foods, sugar and salt all the time. I don't have any idea how much weight I'd like to lose, my goal is to get my eating habits back to normal and if (sure I will) I lose some weight in the meantime that's good, but I'm not going to stare at the scale. My body mass index is at 23,2 which is the highest I've ever been at, so now it's time to take action. I'm still in the normal zone of BMI but with this rate, won't be for long. The way I look and feel, has a huge impact on the way I feel so this change is a very imporatnt one. It's going to make me more healthy and happier at the same time.

- Exercise. Haven't done that much either lately. With that 75 euros I'll save from the energy drinks I'm going to start going to the gym again. Once a week at least. I don't wan't to push myself with this too much or I'll be put out of it immediately. I'll buy the gym card again and see how I'll manage with it. Once now and again is better than never, right?
When most of the snow has melted I'll start running with Jazz again(my other dog). That way I'll give Jazz the exercise he needs and do something myself too. Perfect. I used to hate running but now I have grown to like it, so that's a good exercise form for me. My goal is to do something 6 days a week + walk the dogs everyday. Walking the dogs isn't really exercising for me so I can easily add a bit of hooping to a day easily.(Again I'm talking about "normal" days when I'm mostly at work and at home, a girl needs to have fun too ;)) And hooping will make me happy!

- Money. I don't know how to spend my money in a way I won't end up living on the streets in 5 years. If I don't manage now when I'm still working, what's it going to be like when I'm in school...don't even want to think about it really.
I have this habitof not opening my post. That means I don't know about my bills or important letters. The reason why I don't open them strait away is, that way I can pretend they are not there. If I don't open them I might not have to pay them...how clever. Wonder why it hasn't worked out yet,not even once?? Yes, so, I need to start organizing my money and bills, properly. That way I don't need to feel agitated all the time about money issues, and maybe I would have more money left eventually, to eat properly for example. Budget is the word of the hour.

Those are the main things I'm tackling with. I believe that if I get most of those in to order, other things will start to solve themselves. If I have more energy, and feel better about myself, don't have to worry about money issues so much, I'll be overall happier and that will affect every aspect of my life. What a lovely thought, isn't it?
I'm hoping I'll stick to this plan and get my rainbow after the rain. :)

First Aid Kit

Then in to something completely different...I wen't to a gig in the Club Tavastia last Thursday. I'm still over the moon after it!! I wen't to see two Swedish sister sing...they are called First Aid Kit. One of the most uplifting and ispiring gigs I've ever been at!

These two sisters are only 19 and 16 years old. They scream talent!
This is one of my favourite songs of theirs...this band is my new love. :D

Hope you all have a nice week!

United Kingdom

All pics by me.

I went to England and came back. Like always, it was exactly what I needed. When ever I feel overwhelmed about my life, or have far too much things going on(mainly in my head), all I need to do is to go to England to visit my sister.


I went to the Helsinki-Vantaa airport really early so I could have my breakfast there. It has become a little routine of mine that I want to go through everytime. I love the airport atmosphere. I love looking at people on their holiday moods, or with their laptops, looking really important flying to a business meeting somewhere in Europe.

I bought a book from the airport, that I started in the plane, and ended on my way back. I recommend it to everyone! It's been a long time since a book has got me this excited about reading! It's called "The truth about Melody Browne" and it's written by Lisa Jewell. It was a random pick, I just went to the bookstore looked at the top 10 list and picked out the one that had the nicest looking cover. Read it!! It's a book you can't put down even if you wanted to...I read it every night before going to sleep, and I never wanted to stop. No matter how tired I was I tried to read it atleast one eye open. So go and find it, read it.


One thing I have to say about Finnish people at airports is...about queuing.
Easy Jet (that I use, 'cause it ridicilously cheap!!100€ round trip to the UK and back) has this boarding system at the gate where they ask passengers to board in groups. You get to know your group at the check-in desk. They announce about that system at the gate...every time. They are very specific about how the boarding will proceed. First Speedy Boarding pass holders, then parents traveling with kids, then group A and B and so on. Simple, right?

But what does the Finns do...EVERYTIME. Right the second they hear the first word of the announcement that might indicate that it's time to board the plane, they get up and go for a que. No one listens to what the flight attendand is saying, they just push and shove around and stand in a que. Then they stand there for half an hour or more for no reason. Why is that?? Why are Finns like that? I'm sure no one believes that they will be left out from the plane if they don't stand in a que straight away...or is it about that they are afraid they won't get good seats in the plane?(Easy Jet has free seating) It can't be that either 'cause even though how hard they que they won't be let in the plane before it's their groups time to board!! I'm ridicilously annyoed everytime I have to watch this happen! You'd think it's not my problem, and it isn't but as it happens everytime, it's strated to annoy me more and more and yet some more. I feel like shouting at them, to tell them to go and SIT BACK DOWN!!! Haven't done that yet...but with this rate I will someday :D.


When we landed to the Gatwick airport, my sister was there waiting for me with their two kids. E is 3 years old and H is 1 year old. Can't help but love them. They are one of the most innovative, active and well-behaved little girls. A credit to their parents.


My holiday consisted mainly of food, walking around, playing with the children and taking pics. My goal was to relax and forget my life for a while. No internet, no phone no nothing. Just the English air and my sister and her family. Absolutely fabulous.

Covent Garden Market

My sister lives in Maindenhead, which is located on the west side of London, 20 minutes by train to the Paddington Station. We were supposed to go to National Photography Gallery in London, but when we got there, there was a note on the door saying the exhibition had moved to another location. We had the children with us so we really didn't wan't to go and look for it...as it turned out to be quite far away. We had just came by train and bus and the kids were really fed up with all the traveling so we had to come up with something else. Fortunately I had seen an add about an Irving Penn exhibition in the London Portrait Gallery! I had thought to myself that maybe I would have wanted to go there instead anyway, so I was happy that we were only a block away from the Portrait Gallery so we decided to go there!

Irving Penn is my new idol. He's done work to Vogue since 1940's. He's other work is amazing too. He's got a style of his own that makes his work very recognizable. I walked through the exhibition with my jaw dropped to the groung, stars and hearts flying from my eyes...great work.
I got really ispired of his work...so now I've got many new photography ideas that I can't wait to try! Just need to find the right models for them!

I bought a poster of one of his photographs. Now I need to get it framed, then I'll always have a piece of him hanging on my wall. One of my favourite pics of his was about Truman Capote, it's not the one I got, since they didn't have it (and I couldn't find it in the internet) but THIS gives a good idea about what his work is like.



Otherwise I spent time on the sofa, reading books to the children, blowing soap bubbles outside and soaking in the sun and warmth of the English spring.


Other place worth mentioning, that we visited, is a National Trust owned manor house called Cliveden. It has been used as a hunting "hut"...a real hut or cottage indeed...it was HUGE. We walked around the gardens (there were many) and the next day me and my sister went for a high tea inside the house. A proper afternoon tea. I'm so sorry that I didn't bring my camera with me there...I thought it wouldn't be appropriate 'cause my camera is so big and clumsy. But now I regret it...the house was so awesome! The carpets, paintings, furniture, chandeliers and everything else was pure magic. I could see and hear the history of the place..see how the people living in the house have looked like, what they've done there. Maybe sat by the fire doing some nitting in their gorgeous gownds and posh wigs.

And there we were, drinking tea, eating finger breads and skons with clotted cream and jam just like they have, a few hundred years ago. Marvellous.



I think I'll never get bored of going to England. There's something about the atmosphere there that makes me feel like I'm home everytime. It's good to have a place like that.


Rest of the pics can be found here: click click.
My suggestion is that you put it on Slideshow and listen to "Oasis - Wonderwall" while watching.

Important day.

My very very dear friend is having a baby today. Actually she's having it right now as I'm writing. ..
I feel like I should be doing something for her, but sure I realize there's nothing I can do and it's driving me crazy! Having a baby is something that friends are not that much involved in, untill things have settled down a bit inside the FAMILY. They are a family now...a "real family". That's a mind blowing thought, and at the same time I'm so happy and proud that I might burst soon!!

Now I'm just anxiously waiting for news! Only thing I know is a sms I got 7am in the morning saying : It's showtime.
I'm leaving to England on monday, so I'm hoping I'll be able to see the baby and especially my new mom friend this weekend, or I'll be very sad...
This is big! The biggest thing that's happened to one of my close friends ever...I'm wishing them lot's of happines and joy. And I'm very happy that I'll be able to be apart of someones life from the beginning. <3 12.3. will be a very important day from now on.



I also made a couple of new ribbons this week! I'm loving them...they turned out quite nice, didn't they!? That pirate one is hilarious. A friend of mine at work, had found a cat mouse from the store without the other eye, so she had an idea to make it a pirate mouse with an eyepatch! I loved the idea straight away so here we are, a pirate mouse with it's treasure on a ribbon..haha



The other one I came up with, when I was going through my old jewellery for the pirate ribbon. I found that purple brooch, and wanted to use it for something...
That "SHHH..." is there for fun :D There's no point in it...






Ps. That's my new bag...!!

How much do you cost?

I'm going to be sold tomorrow...literally.
I'm one of the singles beeing auctioned off in a singles auction this saturday! It's all for charity...and a the best joke for a while! :D There was no reason not to say yes when I was nominated. Should be great fun!

The bidding starts from 1 euro, so no sky high prices to come, or I need MANY bidders. But every penny for charity is better than nothing. I've "hired" friends to bid for me, if A) there's some scary heavy-metal Finn bidding on me B) if no one is bidding!
Here's the link to the event on Facebook.

And here's my "add" (By S)

ANNIKA

"Hei, olen Annika. Paitsi että olen Annika, olen myös impulsiivinen, hauska, sarkastinen, paniikkinen, järkevä, itsenäinen, älytön ja ehkä aavistuksen vinksallaan. Minulla on käytöstavat tilanteen mukaan joko hallussa tai hukassa, mutta yritän aina parhaani. Jos jotain tarkempia speksejä kaivataan, niin lähdetään vaikka siitä, että olen 24-vuotias. Loput saat selvittää itse. ♥"

And roughly translated it goes something like this:

"Hi I'm Annika. And besides beeing Annika I'm, impulsive,funny,sarcastic,panicy,sensible,independent, mad and slightly crooked. Sometimes I've got manners, sometimes not, but I always try my best. If more detailed info is needed let's start with the fact that I'm 24 years old. The rest you need to find out yourself.♥"

S sure knows what she's talking about...she's right on! I'd buy myself based on this add, so it must be good :D Wish me luck and lot's of money to charity! Exciting!