Changes.

Things need to change, and it's not going to be pleasant at first.
Have you ever kinda woke up to see that your life isn't what you would like it to be? You've just been living your life and doing things without really paying attention HOW you're living and doing things...with rising anxiety. Well mine is pretty much coming to it's peak, so I've decided to make some re-evaluations.

The problems are, that it feels like I never have the time or energy to do things I feel would need to be done, like cleaning, exercising, and taking care of the dogs properly. There are multiple reasons why things are like this and I'm going to try to tackle every one of them.

This is my holy list of changes:

- First and foremost I need to cut back on using the internet. The main reason why I never feel like I don't have time for anything is this little rectangle black machine! I have a new rule, I'm allowed to check my Facebook account twice a week...and boy is that going to be hard! I'm way too addicted to it, checking it every five minutes or even more often when I'm at home, or even when I'm visiting someone. I calculated that when I limit my internet time to twice a week instead of everyday I save up to 21hours a week!!! 21hours! That's almost a whole day...that will leave me with plenty of time to do all the other things I'm planning to do.

- The second thing has to do with sleeping. If I want to be more energetic I need to sleep enough, go to bed earlier and wake up earlier. So bed time on a normal night (means I'm just hanging at home not doing anything special: going out with someone or something) is 11pm. I usually go to work at 12pm so if I wake up at 8am that would mean I have 3,5 hours of active time in the mornings before I need to go to work...and I still have slept for 9 hours. Not a bad deal at all.
The problem with this is that I'm not a morning person...really, I'm not. So if this proves to be too difficult I'll make some compromises with this one, or else I'll be really annoyed...all the time. But I'll try to make it work!

- No energy drinks. NONE. They are bad for me, and they cost a lot of money and are addicting. I drink approximately 1 energy drink a day. One costs around 2,5euros. That costs me 75,00 euros a month. Ridicilous, absolutely ridicilous. This is an easy thing to do, I'll just think about the 75 euros every time I feel like buying one.

- Remember my post around Christmas, where I promised to lose 5 kilos? Well I did promise that...but no I haven't lost the weight. I had a good start, but then life came and changed everything and whoooops I've actually almost gain 5 kilos. I haven't felt this dissapointed in myself for a long time, or been bothered about my looks this much either since my eating disorder times. My eating habits have spinned out of control, which have made my body crave for fatty foods, sugar and salt all the time. I don't have any idea how much weight I'd like to lose, my goal is to get my eating habits back to normal and if (sure I will) I lose some weight in the meantime that's good, but I'm not going to stare at the scale. My body mass index is at 23,2 which is the highest I've ever been at, so now it's time to take action. I'm still in the normal zone of BMI but with this rate, won't be for long. The way I look and feel, has a huge impact on the way I feel so this change is a very imporatnt one. It's going to make me more healthy and happier at the same time.

- Exercise. Haven't done that much either lately. With that 75 euros I'll save from the energy drinks I'm going to start going to the gym again. Once a week at least. I don't wan't to push myself with this too much or I'll be put out of it immediately. I'll buy the gym card again and see how I'll manage with it. Once now and again is better than never, right?
When most of the snow has melted I'll start running with Jazz again(my other dog). That way I'll give Jazz the exercise he needs and do something myself too. Perfect. I used to hate running but now I have grown to like it, so that's a good exercise form for me. My goal is to do something 6 days a week + walk the dogs everyday. Walking the dogs isn't really exercising for me so I can easily add a bit of hooping to a day easily.(Again I'm talking about "normal" days when I'm mostly at work and at home, a girl needs to have fun too ;)) And hooping will make me happy!

- Money. I don't know how to spend my money in a way I won't end up living on the streets in 5 years. If I don't manage now when I'm still working, what's it going to be like when I'm in school...don't even want to think about it really.
I have this habitof not opening my post. That means I don't know about my bills or important letters. The reason why I don't open them strait away is, that way I can pretend they are not there. If I don't open them I might not have to pay them...how clever. Wonder why it hasn't worked out yet,not even once?? Yes, so, I need to start organizing my money and bills, properly. That way I don't need to feel agitated all the time about money issues, and maybe I would have more money left eventually, to eat properly for example. Budget is the word of the hour.

Those are the main things I'm tackling with. I believe that if I get most of those in to order, other things will start to solve themselves. If I have more energy, and feel better about myself, don't have to worry about money issues so much, I'll be overall happier and that will affect every aspect of my life. What a lovely thought, isn't it?
I'm hoping I'll stick to this plan and get my rainbow after the rain. :)

First Aid Kit

Then in to something completely different...I wen't to a gig in the Club Tavastia last Thursday. I'm still over the moon after it!! I wen't to see two Swedish sister sing...they are called First Aid Kit. One of the most uplifting and ispiring gigs I've ever been at!

These two sisters are only 19 and 16 years old. They scream talent!
This is one of my favourite songs of theirs...this band is my new love. :D

Hope you all have a nice week!